ADOPTION
NEWSLETTER
APRIL, 2003
FROM JAN'S DESK..
Dear Friends and
Families,
Happy
Spring! After what seemed like months
and months of dreary weather, the bright
sunshine and cool breezes are a welcome
experience. It is a time of renewal
and a time of rebirth.a beautiful reminder
of our Lord's loving gift of life everlasting.
This
year has been our busiest ever!
As I write this, 3 of your babies are
in the hospital waiting to go home.
They will count for our 23rd,
24th, and 25th placements
for the year. Number 21 was our
1000th adoptive placement.
You can read more about her elsewhere
in the newsletter.
Because
we have been so busy, we are using up
our pool of waiting adoptive families
rapidly. If you are considering
adding to your family or if you know of
someone who is.now is the time to get
your inquiry papers into our office.
I hope to hold another orientation in
May. Traditionally, I do not have
another orientation until fall because
our staff vacations. Just
call the office and we will be happy to
get an info packet out.or you can go to
the "contact us" link on our website (www.AIMadoptions.org)
and request the packet online.
In
the midst of our scurrying from here to
there, we have seen several needs that
we would like to be able to fill.
One is the need for parenting classes
to help our clients enhance their skills
with parenting the children they are raising.
We often see young women who are parenting
1, 2, or 3 children and find the experience
frustrating. These families
are often at risk for Children's Protective
Service intervention. We are talking
with a loving kind, Christian social worker
with teaching skills. She has shown
an interest in starting this program.
The cost for her time and for materials
must come from donations or a grant.
We are interested in applying for a grant.
We need suggestions. Got any?
Another
need is for an ongoing group to deal with
birth families grief process after the
adoptive placement and an ongoing group
to help children with feelings about their
own adoption. Grieving is a natural
process and is expected whenever anyone
experiences a loss.even if the loss appears
to be the decision of the grieving person.
The process can begin at anytime after
the decision to plan an adoption for their
child. Talking in a group situation
is reassuring and conforting.while it
aids the healing process. We are
also interested in applying for a grant
to help offset the cost of these two groups.
The costs for the grief group can come
out of the general fund but the cost of
the children's group can not. So,
keep your ears open.and pass any hints
on to Anne.
Love, Jan
FAMILY
PICNIC..
Another reminder from
our spring weather.The A.I.M. Family Picnic.
Look for the invitation attached to this
newsletter. It has all the promises
of a wonderful chance to renew old friendships,
catch up on the latest from other adoptive
families, and spend a fun-filled day with
your children. You won't want to
miss a moment of it, and you might even
stay long after the picnic is over.
As
you know, we strongly advise that you
attend at least one of our two annual
socials. We feel that exposure to
other children whose families were built
through adoption helps our children view
adoption as another "normal" part of life.
Children tend to take their cues from
the adults around them. If the adults
are comfortable with issues like adoption
and birth parents, their children will
be more likely to come to the parent to
ask questions or just to share his or
her feelings. Because the agency
is in its late teens..some of our children
are in their teens. Most of our
teenagers do not have the advantages that
the babies of today have in regards to
information about their biological families.
Some have harbored questions and feelings
that they never shared with their parents
because they did not know that it was
okay to talk about their adoption.
Some families left the agency with a newborn,
went home and put away all of the information
about the birth parents "in a safe place"
until the child "was old enough to understand".
Adoption was rarely discussed beyond
the initial "telling" and the occasional
reminder. Several of these
children have searched and located their
birth parents on the internet or called
our agency requesting information.without
discussing it with their parents.
Not one of these children had attended
the agency functions with their parents.
The child just wanted to know and he/she
didn't ask their parents (even when the
parents had told them to ask) because
the child thought his/her parents would
be hurt. We believe that attending
the function with your child sends a clear
message that adoption is a part of his/her
life and that adoption is embraced by
their parents at the blessing we all know
adoption to be.
One
more little note about attending.many
adoptive parents feel that participation
in an open adoption, where the child has
face to face contact with his biological
family, eliminates the need for tools
to help him or her be comfortable with
the adoption process. We feel that
adoption is a life-long process that evokes
many different feelings at various stages
of growth. The AIM functions give
your child an opportunity to have access
to agency personnel and provides a viable
pathway to answers.
The AIM Family functions
are for adoptive parents and their children
ONLY. Biological families do not
attend.
As
always, if you don't attend..it won't
be any fun for us! And, we love
fun! Bring Grandma and Grandpa.
Bring your child's best friend!
Come!
BIG
TIME REMINDER! We always need good
used (well, we would take new also) furniture,
TVs, and linens for our apartments.
We now have someone available to pick
up donations with a 24 hour notice.
We provide housing for approximately 25
clients annually. Each time a client
moves out, we have to refurnish the apartment.
In other situations, we meet with a client
and find out that she lives in her own
apartment.but has no furniture!
STAFF NEWS.
Jan
and Alan are in the midst of "the big
move". Although they were flooded
twice in the 16 years that they have lived
there, the Deets family never actually
had to move out of their home. Instead,
they, an ice chest, and the microwave
moved upstairs until the damage was repaired.
I guess they weren't interested in that
old "the third time is a charm" adage.
They are moving over to the "right side
of I45", where the rest of us live,.
But, the biggest news is.Wade and Westin
are going to begin high school in the
fall..WOW!
Bette
and Anne both have daughters graduating
from high school. Both are
graduating with honors. Both
are filling out scholarship forms like
crazy. Both have selected
and been accepted to state colleges.
Both have no idea what they are going
to be when they grow up. Both
mothers began crying in September and
hope to be cried out enough by graduation
to see their daughters receive their diplomas.
Want to know why there are so many "both"s
in this paragraph? Because Bette
and Anne are both sisters and Meghan
and Alysa are both cousins!
Malinda
finds herself approaching middle age.
The proof is that her oldest daughter,
Madison, is entering high school in the
fall. Malinda seems to be handling
things well.she gets medication from her
psychiatrist, therapy from her psychologist,
support from those of us who have been
there.and survived, and prayers from her
church. She has installed a highly
sensitive home security system, enrolled
in a self-defense class, planted spies
in the high school, cancelled the home
phone, and grounded Madison for life!
Think it'll work? Oh, and she welcomes
advice. Just email her at mlandry@aimadoptions.org.
We
have all been rejoicing with Dee and her
daughter, Mindy, since the INS allowed
Mindy's husband (Manny's dad) to return.
Two years ago, he was deported for
an old offense.even though he was in the
middle of completing his residency papers.
We have prayed and worried and prayed
with them for two years. Finally!
The news came in mid-April that he would
return and the rejoicing began!
BUNDLES FROM HEAVEN.
We have witnessed so
many miracles we first began. Many
of these blessings involve participating
in the building of your family.
We have seen the miracle of our Lord providing
just the right family for a birth mother
that needed the touch a only particular
type of family could give her. Several
times a year, the Lord gives us the challenge
of finding just the right home for one
of His special little angels (some would
call them special needs babies).and then
providing that family. He
is faithful and we rejoiced when our Lord
gave.
Andrew and Wendi to Peyton & Vincent
Jon and Kathy to Zackariah
Clint and Serina to Dean
Dave and Lenora to Grace
Nate and Daveanna to Gabriel
Theron and Kay to Callie
Ed and Karen to Ella
Johnny and Karen to Jamie
Ed and Lisa to Isaiah
Scott and Kim to Katie
Dannen and Deanne to Kyla
Kiki and Lucinda to Mateo
Kevin and Stephanie to Jessica
Paul and Katie to Micah
Bill and Amy to James
Mark and Jeanne to Carson
Paul and Colleen to Kevin
Scotty and Jonda to Andrew
Alex and Ericalynn to Jonathan
Ron and Jan to Zachary
WE'RE BRAGGING ABOUT OUR FOSTER PARENTS.
We feel that we are
especially blessed with four of the greatest
foster families around. They give
so much to our babies while they wait
for Mommie and Daddy to come take them
home. The hours are long (who wants
to know there is a never ending stream
of newborns who will be waking you up
in the middle of the night for a change
and a bottle?) and the pay is ridiculous
($17.50 a day to cover diapers and formula
and clothes and equipment). Our
foster moms rarely have 24 hour notice
before the next little angel is brought
to spend a few days; however, without
exception each foster mom is ready and
willing to open their arms.
They love and care for the babies for
those few days and then glow as they share
all of the little "unique" qualities of
the baby to its new parents. A little
bit about these special people..
AIM
has four active foster homes now, with
the Perry home coming up on their 12th
year anniversary the eleventh of this
month. We consider Robin Perry our
expert in temporary care. She can take
care of newborns with one hand tied behind
her back. She knows thousands of
newborn quirks and loves sharing her knowledge
with others.
Then
there is the Adams's home situated in
the wide open, rural beauty of Willis,
Texas with Kristi Adams being the most
cheerful and flexible human being known
to man. If we need a place for a sibling
group of four, Kristi says "Yes!" The
highlight of her day, she says, is a call
from AIM.
In
the Quebodeaux home we can rest assured
that any medical questions or conditions
will be well handled by our resident nurse,
Amy. For many years, Amy watched
her best friend, Robin, take care of our
children, then decided one day she had
watched long enough and that it was time
to join in the fun. Our only worry
with Amy is the ensuing arguments between
her and Robin over who gets our babies
first.
For
our teenage clients that need a home away
from home during their pregnancy, we call
on Suzanne Szugye who knows all about
housing birth moms from her experience
growing up with the Landrys. Like her
mother and father, she has opened her
home to offer comfort and security for
young women at a trying time in their
lives.
Each
of our foster parents offers AIM an invaluable
service that provides brick and mortar
to our organization. When we need foster
care, we need good foster care,
and without a doubt, this is what Robin,
Kristi, Amy, and Suzanne give us. Because
of their expertise and dedication we can
rest peacefully knowing our babies and
children are in excellent hands.
OUR
1000TH PLACEMENT.
In
late March, Stephanie and Kevin traveled
from Idaho to meet their new daughter,
Jessica Troi.
Entering
the world on March 13th , Jessica weighed
5 pounds 11 ounces. She is the first
baby to bless their marriage. As
you can tell from the picture, Mom and
Dad might know she is our 1000th.but
she will always be Number 1 in their book!
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